Thanks to 2010's "Piranha 3-D," there will always be a special wing in my film-loving heart dedicated to French horror director Alexandre Aja.
What makes the sleeze-stravaganza so wonderful is that Aja and company knew they were tasked with making a horror comedy about ravenous prehistoric fish om-nomming bubbly, bouncy spring breakers and therefore set out of to make the silliest, giddiest and most unapologetically entertaining horror comedy about ravenous prehistoric fish om-nomming bubbly, bouncy spring breakers. The part of your brain the rest of your brain is ashamed of being attached to has never been so gleefully satisfied.
The point (to pry my drooling mouth away from "Piranha 3-D" for just a moment) is that Aja knew exactly what that movie was ... which makes it all the more disappointing that Aja seems clueless with what to do with his latest film, the clunky tonal puree "Horns."
The movie's unique concept at least qualifies it as a pretty interesting oddball experience – even if it's never a particularly good experience. As "Horns" keeps accidentally proving, sometimes there are good reasons why bizarro original premises haven't been turned into movies before.
About that bizarro original premise. Based on the novel by Joe Hill, Harry Potter himself Daniel Radcliffe plays Ig Perrish, a scowling, drunken small town DJ with a local media circus on his front lawn. See, everybody in town is convinced he's raped and murdered his beloved church-going girlfriend Merrin (a wasted Juno Temple, stuck playing victim), making him beyond the town pariah. Ig can't even get the seediest townie bar to serve him without a fight.
A domestic murder mystery with the media loudly clattering in the background? Why yes, that does sound a bit like "Gone Girl," but the passing similarities soon end as "Horns" quickly takes a right turn at the supernatural and speeds toward Looneytown.
After a rough drunken bender, Ig wakes up with a particularly head-banging hangover, possibly due to a brand new set of demonic horns jutting out of his cranium. They start discreetly as little brown nubs sticking out right under his hairline, but soon Ig’s headwear grows out like he’s Tim Curry in "Legend" or at least the new demon-possessed mascot for the St. Louis Rams.
Obviously, sporting a pair of devil horns won’t help his local PR campaign, but it does come with one huge advantage: Everyone in town is suddenly compelled to tell Ig their secrets and indulge in their deepest desires. The sad town floozy gulps down an entire box of donuts, the insistent media fights to the death for an exclusive interview with Ig and the doctor can’t help taking a break mid-operation to sample his painkillers – and his nurse.
He may be the pariah on trial with the devilish horns, but it soon becomes clear everyone else in town has their own hidden darkness and freaky secrets hidden under the veneer of small town civility. So, with his horns putting everyone in a confessional mood, Ig sets out to find Merrin’s real killer and clear his name.
On paper, "Horns" certainly sounds like a monumentally weird movie, what with the lie detector horns and locals literally settling the town ablaze. On screen, it plays even weirder – and not in a good way. Aja seems unsure of what to do with Keith Bunin’s tonally ADD screenplay, hopping from goofy profane dark comedy to swoony glowing romance to grim murder mystery drama before heading back to the occult dark comedy. It makes for a rough ride, with each tonal shift making the previous one feel entirely out of place.
An extremely extended flashback of a growing young childhood romance is sweet, but also seemingly random when wedged in between darkly goofy horns antics and media member fisticuffs. It’s rare for "Horns" to have two back-to-back scenes that feel like they come from the same movie.
Even stylistically Aja seems a little uneasy or uncertain with the material. There’s a hazy softness to the visuals, taking away the movie’s literal edge. When the horns start wreaking their havoc on the town, it’s an over-the-top, off-kilter situation given a bland presentation. In fact, other than the behavior, it’s close enough to real life that the audience is left asking questions like, "Wait, what’s actually happening right now? Are these people actually doing these crazy things, or is it just a delusion?" rather than enjoying the entertaining chaos. It's not funny, just odd.
Creatively or otherwise, it’s a movie that lacks energy, a problem that becomes all the more glaring as "Horns" rolls along its bloated 121-minute running time. Eventually, the script tonally settles – at least as much as it can possibly settle – on its murder mystery plot, and unfortunately one doesn’t have to be Hercule Poirot to solve this case pretty early on.
The bigger issue, however, is that the plot moves toward seriousness while at the same time getting much sillier. Ig picks up some snake friends and a pitchfork, deaths are for some reason supernaturally undone and there’s even a big CG demon versus murderer showdown that might have worked if "Horns" was still in goofy dark comedy mode. Instead, all of this occurs with a weirdly straight face as it tries and stumbles to come to a poignant, sweet conclusion – mixed with gory blasts of shotgun shells and snakes to the face.
Amongst all the clutter, some stuff works. Aja is at his most engaged, both comedically and dramatically, when Ig gets his horns early on and discovers his powers. The satirical uncovering of the small town’s vulgar side is amusing, while a tragically enlightening visit to Ig’s parents (James Remar and Kathleen Quinlan) is almost heartbreaking.
Plus, it has a strong, confident lead turn from Radcliffe, who gleefully dives into his pretty prickly character. It's nice seeing the character really break comfortably from his Harry Potter roots, trying out interesting roles that push him in compelling directions. Even as the movie wavers in every possible direction, Radcliffe holds down the fort, mixing Ig's smirking amusement to proper people revealing their true natures with his angry guilt over his lost loved one and the mistakes made along the way. The only reason the viewer buys into any of the silliness on screen is thanks to his charisma and commitment.
If only the rest of "Horns" was as committed to, well, anything. I’d like to recommend "Horns" for its originality and off-kilter imagination, but the pieces just don’t come together for Aja. It’s a mess, but hey, at least we’ll always have "Piranha 3-D."
As much as it is a gigantic cliché to say that one has always had a passion for film, Matt Mueller has always had a passion for film. Whether it was bringing in the latest movie reviews for his first grade show-and-tell or writing film reviews for the St. Norbert College Times as a high school student, Matt is way too obsessed with movies for his own good.
When he's not writing about the latest blockbuster or talking much too glowingly about "Piranha 3D," Matt can probably be found watching literally any sport (minus cricket) or working at - get this - a local movie theater. Or watching a movie. Yeah, he's probably watching a movie.