It's a new season for the Green Bay Packers, filled with new faces, a new (already broken) head coach, a newly healthy Aaron Rodgers and new promise. But enough with all that positivity; let's balance that out with Deadspin's annual thorough crapping upon the Pack. Because last season REALLY deserved it.
Yes, it's time for writer (and Vikings fan) Drew Magary's ingloriously glorious Why Your Team Sucks series has made it to the Packers – sooner than usual because yikes, I mean, you saw what happened last year. And in case you didn't, Magary runs through every awful thing that happened to Green Bay – and that Green Bay inflicted upon itself. That list includes, but is not limited to:
- Having to come back to beat the awful San Francisco 49ers and the hilariously named C.J. Beathard
- The Ty Montgomery debacle
- Bleacher Report's infamous autopsy on the Packers' season and Mike McCarthy's firing, which included claims of low football IQ and skipping meetings for massages. The entire article is now tattooed on Magary's back.
- Aaron Rodgers' habit of holding grudges like Madeline on "Big Little Lies"
- Hiring the guy behind the Tennessee Titans' impressively unimpressive offense as head coach because he's young and breathed oxygen in the same room as Rams head coach Sean McVay once
And so much more (I don't even know if he even mentioned the loss to the Cardinals) all eloquently and profanely recapped by Magary for your enjoyment. Because the Packers deserve it. We finished with a worse record than the Cleveland Browns. THE BROWNS!! We don't even have Brett Hundley and a broken collarbone to blame for our mediocrity this time!
Read the entire piece here and feel a strong sense of catharsis recapping all that failure and hopefully leaving it behind for a strong 2019-20 campaign that's a return to form for the Pack. And don't worry, Magary's own Vikings will be on deck shortly – and sooner than expected as well, since they traded out Case Keenum for Kirk Cousins, as well as a NFC Championship visit for an early trip to the golf course. Oh, and speaking of that NFC Championship Game ...
As much as it is a gigantic cliché to say that one has always had a passion for film, Matt Mueller has always had a passion for film. Whether it was bringing in the latest movie reviews for his first grade show-and-tell or writing film reviews for the St. Norbert College Times as a high school student, Matt is way too obsessed with movies for his own good.
When he's not writing about the latest blockbuster or talking much too glowingly about "Piranha 3D," Matt can probably be found watching literally any sport (minus cricket) or working at - get this - a local movie theater. Or watching a movie. Yeah, he's probably watching a movie.
